How well do you actually know yourself? Have you sat and thought about it before? We often know our kids or family members inside and out, yet deciding what we love or actually want out of life is like a foreign species living at the bottom of the ocean, never to be revealed.
On a scale of 1-10, how well would you say you know yourself? If you scored yourself on the higher side, good for you! Yet, if you are on the lower side, it may be time to start building a wholesome, loving relationship with the truly most important person on earth, YOU!
Why is Getting to Know Yourself so Important?
It is important to know who you are so you will be able to relate better to the world around you. You must grow your relationships with yourself so you can determine your likes and dislikes. Moreover, knowing what brings you negative emotions and what sparks joy, are the key to living a better life by avoiding or having more joyful moments. Also, knowing your values will help you better find companions with like interests.
According to Psychology Today, self-awareness is a good predictor of future success. This is why is it vital to get to know yourself, and build a relationship with your core values and thoughts.
As you continue reading, you will find tips and tricks on how to accomplish this mighty, yet important task.
Here are Five Tips to Help You Build a Relationship with Yourself:
#1 Stop focusing on others
Do you often focus on others instead of yourself?
One way to get to know yourself better and focus more on your needs is to shift your focus from always worrying and caring about others, to focus on the needs of yourself and your own purpose.
You can start living life to its fullest extent when you are more concerned about yourself than getting into petty gossip or drama with the people around you or on social media.
Other people can be a distraction from your goals and leave you adrift on a small piece of wood bobbing up and down in the ocean. Yet to be more grounded and come to the shore, you can stop worrying about what others are or aren’t doing, and focus on yourself.
Moreover, it is easy to focus on others as we tend to compare our lives with the people we see or surround ourselves with. We often gossip and carry on about what so and so is doing. Yet, when you are choosing to focus on others, you are using precious time and energy that could have been used on the work you need to do on yourself.
In our every changing technology-driven world, it is so easy to get caught up on social media and even envy others’ lives. These distractions keep us from reaching our own goals and often leave us feeling insecure and less than perfect.
When you’re comparing your wonderful life to others’ perfection in a picture, insecurities can pop up, and often you are driven even further from your goals.
One thing you can do becomes aware that you are comparing, and learn to let go of jealousy and envy. Remember each person’s journey is different and you can find gratitude in your own life every day.
#2 Forgiveness is Key
Are you carrying baggage from your past? Often in forgiving, we are actually healing ourselves.
Think about it… If you are angry with someone, would you want to drink a bunch of poison to make them feel worse? In choosing to carry anger and resentment, you are poisoning yourself, not them. If you want to improve your relationship with yourself, it is time to let go of any anger, sadness, and resentment from the past. In fact, the past is best left in the past. The future hasn’t occurred, so learn to live in the “now” and be present.
Instead of carrying a chip on your shoulder, leaving you feeling like a ticking time bomb, it is best to forgive others for your own sake.
If you carry anger, your mind will often jump to anger. You will find yourself snapping at others that had nothing to do with the past trauma in your life.
Learn to let go and leave it behind you. Try not to dwell or think about the past. Journal about how you forgive your tormentors and move forward.
You don’t have to become best friend with any certain person you choose to forgive, or even tell them you have forgiven them, but do it for yourself so you can move past these feelings.
As you begin to forgive, you will feel a weight lifted in your physiology. The part of your mindset that has been holding on to negativity and toxicity will be open to more positive thoughts and opportunities. You can use this positivity to go out and spread kindness in the world and focus on your goals.
#3 Learn to Help and Care for Others in Need
Helping others can give one immense joy. As you start to have a positive outlook, you can take your joy and send those vibes everywhere you go.
If you can break the habit of focusing on the negative, you can give your positive side a boost by giving your time to others in need. Start by finding an animal shelter or homeless shelter to volunteer your time. Help an elderly person carry groceries. Donate the next time you have the opportunity. These will all leave you with a positive happy feeling and that is where you want your focus to be as you continue building a relationship with yourself.
Related: Am I Missing Out on Life?
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#4 Journal to Build a Relationship With Yourself
When we put our thoughts on paper, we solidify what and how we are feeling. Then read them back to yourself and determine how you were feeling and note your triggers. Also, pay attention to instances that spark joy.
If you are having self-doubt about upcoming decisions, your journal can help you sort things out.
Use your journal to prioritize what is important in your life and how your feelings are valid.
Once you build a relationship with yourself, you can begin to set goals based upon what is important and it will be easier to make changes if you can pinpoint how you are feeling and push through and self-doubt.
Related: How to Make Life More Manageable
#5 Practice Positive Self-Talk
Learn some positive affirmations. Post them on your mirror and say them every morning and every evening. Start and end your day on a positive note. Talk bout what you are good at and tell yourself you can accomplish anything. The more you hear these positive attributes, the more you will focus on them and achieve your goals.
Related Personal Development Posts:
- Worst Bad Habits I Should Get Rid of Now
- 25 Best Micro-Habits to Start Your Year Off Right in 2022
- The Art of Goal Setting
- How to be More Fun
Build a Relationship With Yourself Final Thoughts…
Like a butterfly emerging from a cacoon, you can pull yourself out of any negativity and emerge a beautiful, joyful, happy person. As you begin to build a new relationship with yourself, you will find contentment as you spread your wings. Fluttering high above the gossip and jealousy of comparison, you will embrace the gentle breeze and grow to new heights.